


The New Guy

by Dilly_Oh



Category: Naruto
Genre: Community: kakairu_fest, Humor, KakaIru Month 2015, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2015-06-19
Packaged: 2018-04-05 04:21:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4165641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dilly_Oh/pseuds/Dilly_Oh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Hello," Kakashi thinks to himself. "He's new."</p>
<p>Written for the Kakairu Month 2015, June 19 prompt: How did you go from cute to annoying so fast?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The New Guy

“Hello,” Kakashi thinks to himself. “He’s new.”

The newbie at the Mission Desk is young, most likely Chunnin rank, and utterly scrumptious. Beautiful, tanned skin that’s been toned to perfection, hair like one of those shampoo commercials, and a slashing scar across the bridge of his nose that Kakashi wants to write his signature on. It’s near the end of the shift, and by the harried look on the newbie’s face, Kakashi is close to missing out. He cuts in line in front of an older Jounin, who growls in annoyance but knows better than to challenge him, and slithers up to the desk, beaming as much as his one visible eye and mask allows.

“Afternoon.”

“Welcome back,” the cutie greets, and damn it all if his voice isn’t dead sexy too. “Jounin-san-”

"Hatake Kakashi,” Kakashi supplies. “And you are…?”

“Umino Iruka.”

“I wonder if he likes fish,” Kakashi can’t help but think, but wisely keeps it to himself.

“May I see your mission report, Hatake-san?” Iruka asks politely, wasting no time and reaching out a hand.

“Please, call me Kakashi,” Kakashi replies, while thinking, “Or daddy. Please call me daddy.”

“Alright…Kakashi-san,” Iruka agrees, then clears his throat after a moment. His hand is still outstretched. Kakashi hands over the report, making sure to touch Iruka’s fingers a little more than necessary. Iruka goes a little red, but doesn’t jump or squeal (which is rather disappointing) as he takes the report and unrolls it. He studies it critically for all of five seconds before a frown darkens his features.

“…Kakashi-san, this report is simply not acceptable. Sections 2-5 are empty, Section 9 has what looks like blood or strawberry jam on it, and in Section 15, you have drawn…” He squints and peers closely at the messy scribble on the paper. “…A duck.”

“…I can explain-”

“In short, I cannot accept this report.” Iruka cuts him off, giving him a look like a stern teacher who’s had enough of their student’s B.S. to last a lifetime. Kakashi is surprised he hasn’t whipped out a red pen and started attacking the paper. “Please, either clean up this copy, fill out the appropriate sections, _correctly_ , or retrieve a blank mission report from the stack by the far wall and start all over again. I recommend the latter.” He firmly pushes the report back across the desk. “Thank you, have a nice day.”

Kakashi blinks.

“Wow,” he says aloud. “How did you go from cute to annoying so fast?”

“About as fast as it took you to go from obnoxious jerk to complete asshole,” Iruka snaps right back, going even redder. “Which is pretty damn fast considering _you already were_.”

"Well, now you’re just being hurtful.”

“ _Hatake-SAN_ ,” Iruka grinds out, stabbing at the incomplete report with one finger, “it’s been a long day. Either fill out and correct the missing portions of your report, or so help me, I will fill them in for you, forge your own signature, turn in the report and claim the payment. Then I will go to the bank, cash in said payment all in single bills, pour them into a bathtub, and take a bath in them, just to spite you. Do I make myself clear?”

Kakashi stares at him in silence, stunned and a little impressed at the complexity and originality of the insult. Then he opens his mouth.

“…Can I watch?”

It takes three other Chunnin and a Jounin to restrain Iruka while Kakashi runs out of the Mission Office, sure he’s in love.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I got this one done on time! Hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
